Remember To Say It Out Loud

Who do you love?  Why do you love them?  

Is it your daughter, because of how young and healthy and energetic and pretty and smart and optimistic she is and because when you see her you want to smile?  Because she is a smaller and BETTER version of you?

Is it your wife, because of how persistent and dedicated and reliable and soft and sarcastically clever and socially astute and sexually shapely and appropriately motherly to your children she is?  Because she puts up with you and your short-comings and "has-your-back?"

Is it your son, because of how resolute and brave and determined and handsome and charming and wryly humorous and suddenly silly and openly ambitious and fantastically fun he is?  Because when you look at him you see your little brother except you can be nice, now, in ways you never were in your childhood?

Is it your husband, because of how strong and solution focused and protective and thick skinned and efficient and tender and affectionate and vulnerable and willing to fail and warmly authoritative and stubborn he is? Because you know that if necessary he would do anything and give everything for you?

Is it those people, or others?  Is it for those reasons, or for many other reasons?  Whatever the reason and whoever it is, do not forget to mention it -- out loud.

It is good that you think it in your own head, and feel it in your own heart, and can hold these thoughts and feelings in tightly compressed spaces in your head and heart so that you have room to do other things that have to get done. But do not leave them packed away there too long or too deeply compressed, so that they lose their shape. Take your admiration out of storage and share it with your loved ones. Tell them out loud and tell them often.

The golden ratio of positive to negative interactions in a healthy and happy relationship is five to one.
$1.00 : $0.20.
Free throw : layup.
It is pretty easy to fulfill the minimum daily requirement of negativity. It takes work to maintain the lopsidedly healthy five-to-one balance.

Minimize the negativity, and practice practice practice practice practice being positive -- out loud, so they can hear you!  :)